opening the dense tome , you find this is indeed as you expected, a copy of Lord of the rings. Your just about to put it down when suddenly you notice that the author is listed as:

"rjj tornspleen"

And the book bares an inscription in the front cover which reads:

"Despite the many false tellings of the story of the great war of the ring, it is hoped this truthful tale which shows the full suffering of the goblin people and the end of the reign of Sauron the great as it actually happened, free of Elf propergander, will be a valuable aide to both goblins and other intelligent peoples in peacing together the true events of that historical period, free from bias"

Interested to know what a Goblin centric version of the story would be like, you begin flipping through it.

It begins when the Great and wise Lord Sauron, freely gave his time and knolidge to the elves to help them make magic rings. However because Sauron's own ring was (simply through superior skill), far more powerful than theres, the elves initiated a huge war to get it.

This ended when the elve's ally, the pirate king Isildur mutilated Wise Lord Sauron and knicked the ring himself.

however, the elves and their allies were so profoundly greedy, eventually the ring got completely lost until the master Burgler Bilbo baggins stole it from another thief named golum.

bilbo was then robbed by his apprentice Thief Frodo who, it turned out was an elf sympathizer, and under the racist guidance of the wizard Gandalf he set out along with the terrorist Aragorn to both distroy the ring, and give the elves and their allies a political stranglehold over the main powers of the region. This plan involved removing pro-goblin elements in the government of Rohan to instigate an unprovoked attack on the goblin friendly power of Isangard, then creating an anti goblin government in gondor (after doing away with the legitimate ruler in a supposedly! accidental fire in the city's tombs).

With these political allies in place, Gandalf was then able to engeneer a multinational war against Mordor and Sauron's allies.

apparently, all didn't end happily sinse Wise Lord Sauron died in a magical terrorist attack by Frodo on his tower's main power source in a nearby volcano, though there was some justice sinse Frodo, Gandalf and most of the war criminals were exiled across the see to the Valinor penal colony.

Fascinating as all this is, there is however one particular thing that catches your eye as unusual and possibly significant, the first litle poem at the front of this rather reversed edition of lord of the rings:

"1 ring for Sauron the good to hold, nine for Mortals next shal come, seven for dwarves who only love gold, and three for the elves who are utter scum!"

You commit this to memory for later reference, though your uncertain as to why accept it makes your adventurer senses tingle!

What now?

investigate the cash box.

wait for the goblin to return.

copywrite2011 by Dark.